Did You Know You Had Options?

Imagine sitting across from a seasoned executive during a coaching session, sensing the weight of their challenge. They look at you, frustration etched on their face, and declare, "I’ve tried everything!" It’s a statement that often lands with finality, as if the book of possibilities has been slammed shut. But over the years, I’ve learned something priceless in moments like this. That sense of being stuck? It’s often a signal—not that the options are gone, but that they haven’t all been uncovered yet.

Recently, in one of these sessions, I tried something I rarely do. I asked a closed-ended question. Typically, I steer toward open-ended inquiries, the kind that encourage exploration. But this was a moment that called for something different. The energy in the room felt tight, limited, and pressurized. I needed to create a shift. I simply asked, "Is there a third option?" What happened next amazed even me. The room seemed to exhale, as if relief had found its way in. Suddenly, the conversation opened up, and ideas began to flow. That one question unlocked posibilities that had been hidden in plain sight, and the energy shifted from defeated to empowered. It was a reminder of something powerful we often forget: options bring opportunities, and opportunities bring hope.

Why Exploring Options Matters

When faced with a challenge, it’s easy to feel boxed in. You might find yourself caught between two choices: stay or leave, yes or no, this or that. Binary thinking can feel suffocating, especially when the stakes are high. The problem is, when we focus solely on those two paths, we might overlook alternatives that lie just outside our field of vision. What if there was another way? What if, instead of choosing between A and B, you could discover C, D, or even Z? This shift in perspective doesn’t just change the outcome of a decision; it transforms the way we approach challenges in every part of life. Possibilities expand when we grant ourselves the permission to look deeper or wider, and in doing so, we often find not just answers, but opportunities for growth. The key is this: Before you commit to solving a problem, pause and ask yourself, "What else could be true here?"

The Root of the Issue

But before we can brainstorm our paths forward, it’s equally essential to step back and ask why the issue exists in the first place. Too often, we rush into action mode without fully understanding where the challenge is coming from. For example, imagine you’re deeply unsatisfied in your job. One option might be to quit and find a new role. Another might be to stay and learn to tolerate it. But what if those aren’t the only answers? What if the real issue isn’t the job itself, but rather that you’re feeling disconnected from your purpose? What if the dissatisfaction stems from burnout or unexpressed creativity? Each of these root causes might point to a completely different set of solutions. Here’s a question to reflect on: "What’s really underneath this challenge I’m facing?" Peeling back the layers takes intention and courage, but it’s where clarity lives. Once you know the root cause, you set yourself up to make choices that truly align with your needs, goals, and values.

Coaching Questions for Transformation

If you’re feeling stuck, consider pausing to reflect on these questions. They’re designed to help uncover new options and explore the heart of your challenges:

• What are the options I see right now? This grounds you in the present reality.
• What might I not be considering? Open yourself to possibilities beyond what’s immediately visible.
• Is there a third option (or a fourth, or fifth)? Push yourself to think creatively. The answers might surprise you.
• If this problem were resolved, how would my life feel different? Visualize the outcome you’re working toward. It helps clarify what you truly want.
• What might be causing this issue in the first place? Get curious about the root cause rather than jumping right to solutions.
• What strengths or resources can I use to approach this challenge? Acknowledge the tools you already have that can help you make progress.
• Who can I lean on for support as I work through this? Sometimes, exploring options is easier with a trusted guide or sounding board.

The Magic of Possibility

Options are like doors. Each time you discover one, you’re giving yourself the chance to step into a new room, a new experience, a new version of yourself. But here’s the thing about doors: They don’t always announce themselves. Sometimes they’re hidden behind assumptions, buried beneath fear, or simply locked by a perspective that hasn’t expanded yet.

Your Turn

The next time you find yourself saying, “I’ve tried everything,” take a deep breath and remind yourself that you likely haven’t. Remember, the most empowering answers are rarely found outside you. They’re found within. It just takes the right question, the right pause, or the right moment to uncover them. You have options. And those options bring opportunities. What will you discover?